I guess it was just a matter of time, but you can now make your own church signs on-line. (That’s my best idea so far. If you’ve got a better one, send it in.)
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GEORGE WASHINGTON SLEPT HERE
My next best idea was:
DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES
SUNDAY NIGHTS AT 9:00 ON ABC
HEY! AT LEAST
WE ARE NOT A CULT!
PAY NO ATTENTION TO THAT MAN BEHIND THE CURTAIN
U.S. GOVERNMENT APPROVED
WE’RE NUMBER ONE!
USDA GRADE A
WHOLESOME GOODNESS
Not as Much Boy Ass Play as the Catholics
Now with Twice the Hypocrisy!
COME SEE OUR NEW
RECTORY! IT WILL MAKE
YOU WANT TO KNEEL!
“Attend now! Avoid the Christmas rush!”
Only praying seven days in a row makes one weak
Christians Aren
The two I used to link to your story are:
“Everyone welcome! Except you. God hates you.”
and
“Bingo and book burning this Sunday!”
Don’t make me come back there!
My God, My God, what the fuck have you done?!
I’ll tell you one thing he wouldn’t be doing that.
I liked the praying seven days in a row, funny on many levels.
Free wine and breas with every soul.
My personal favorite…”I know what you did last night”
Bring your gun to church week
March 6 – 12
Free blessings on trigger finger
Thou Shalt Not Kill
Unless There’s Lot and Lots of Oil Involved
Thou Shalt Not Kill
Unless it is to Preserve Freedom Around the World
Tipping point:
We will free you people or we will kill every goddamn last one of you in the process.
Unless, JF, you were being facetious.
For the record, he was not being facetious.
JESUS SUPPORTS THE DEATH PENALTY
I saw an actual church sign in Pittsburgh this past week that said:
“Read the Bible-
It will scare the HELL out of you.”
I was pretty impressed.
as for fake signs, how about:
“Over 100 Million Heretics Burned”
or
“Jesus don’t want you for a sunbeam”
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