Ypsi’s summer snowbanks and the trickery of Hollywood exposed

    I took Clementine to look around in front of the local all-nude strip club this afternoon, where our friends from Hollywood will be shooting their big winter street scene tomorrow. She was amazed by how fake the “snow” was that they’d put out. Basically, it was just a bunch of tiny styrofoam balls, swept up into piles, with an occasional thin white blanket taped down over a patch of grass. I told her that it wasn’t all that hard to fool people (see Obama’s fake birth certificate, and the moon landing), and that the folks in Hollywood pretty much had it down to a science. Then, she asked me what they’d do about the bushes and trees, that are now all in full bloom. I didn’t have a good answer. I suppose they could edit them out after the fact using CGI, I told her, like they did with Lindsey Lohan’s breasts in that remake of Herbie the Love Bug. I suspect, however, that they they’ll likely just hire a few local drunks once the bars let out tonight to devour all of the leaves like an army of aphids. So, if you’re looking to earn some money, and they won’t let you sell any more plasma this week, you might want to show up at the intersection of Michigan Ave and North Washington Street tonight at about 2:00 AM.

    And, remember, if you see someone famous, draw them for the pencil paparazzi file. I’d love to get a ton of entries tomorrow.

    ypsisummersnow2

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      10 Comments

      1. Art Schmeg
        Posted June 3, 2011 at 12:17 am | Permalink

        I will light the trees and bushes on fire for free.

      2. Edward
        Posted June 3, 2011 at 8:11 am | Permalink

        I’m curious as to whether they’ll change the Deja Vu marquee. They’ll probalby just shoot in such a way as to avoid the trees, the marquee, and everything but a storefront or two. The who shot will probably be about 20 seconds in the film, if that.

      3. Robert
        Posted June 3, 2011 at 8:24 am | Permalink

        If it gets windy, won’t those little styrofoam balls blow all over town?

      4. Mr. X
        Posted June 3, 2011 at 8:30 am | Permalink

        I didn’t touch them. They might be kind of heavy. They might not be styrofoam. They were shifting around a bit when I was there, though. There were guys with brooms walking up an down the street, trying to keep them in place. I imagine they had to stay out all night doing that.

      5. Edward
        Posted June 3, 2011 at 9:06 am | Permalink

        Word is that they’re spray painting the trees white.

      6. cooter
        Posted June 3, 2011 at 9:09 am | Permalink

        They are currently ‘spray painting’ the trees white…there is ‘dust’ floating all over the place, and no one seems to be wearing masks…even the guy doing the painting. Weird.

      7. gary
        Posted June 3, 2011 at 10:00 am | Permalink

        According to one of the grips, the stuff they are spraying the trees with is paper with perchloroethylene used as a bonding agent.

      8. Ted
        Posted June 3, 2011 at 10:35 am | Permalink

        I’m still laughing about that ridiculous line in the letter from the production company to local business owners, telling them how they were dying to show the world what a lovely community we have here. Not that the story is set in Ypsi, of course, or the name of the town is even mentioned.

      9. Posted June 3, 2011 at 5:15 pm | Permalink

        Someone told me today that it’s illegal to take photos in Ypsilanti today. Apparently film companies can institute martial law.

      10. Christine M
        Posted June 4, 2011 at 11:59 pm | Permalink

        How much do they pay for plasma? I’ve been wondering how much I could get for mine.

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