precious bodily fluids

What about a brand of bottled water with a higher retail price-point than Bling H2O, called Precious Bodily Fluid? The plastic bottles could themselves be sealed inside of plastic containers to doubly ensure freshness. And we could advertise that each bottle has been shipped around the world – TWICE! I wonder how much it would cost to get a few celebrities to carry tiny bottles of it around Los Angeles.

[This post was brought to you by Dr. Strangelove, the Talking Heads, Harriet Miers, John Cusak, Lindsay Lohan, and the new Democratic frontrunner, candidate Goatse.]

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  1. Cleo
    Posted July 25, 2007 at 9:23 am | Permalink

    Get Lindsay Lohan before she’s dead. She’d look great chugging an airplane-sized bottle of Essence.

    (By “airplane-sized”, I don’t mean the size of an airplane. I mean the size of the booze bottles you buy on an airplane.)

  2. Jeff
    Posted July 25, 2007 at 11:53 am | Permalink

    “Replenish your precious bodily fluids with General Jack Ripper’s Essence, now available at Neiman Marcus.”

    And I just donated $1,000 to the Goatse. I like what he stands for.

  3. egpenet
    Posted July 25, 2007 at 3:48 pm | Permalink

    Great idea! Bottled plasma! Wouldn’t need it in a pint, though. Half-pints would do. Wouldn’t taste too good though, kind’a ozzy and salty. Need to flavor it.

    Has the name Precious Blood Plasma been used yet?

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