sorry that everything is temporarily fucked

The site’s been down for the better part of the last week. It seems to be up right now, but I don’t know how long it will last. I’m sorry, but there’s not much that I can do about it. My friend Steve, who manages the technical aspects of this site, tells me that, in his professional opinion, the company doing the hosting is seriously fucked. For some reason, and we still haven’t been told why, they locked us out of our own account for four days. No explanation was given, and our letters went unanswered. So, we’re in the process of pulling up stakes and hauling this big, dead carcass of this site to greener pastures. Sorry for the interruption in service. I know that for a lot of you this site is all you have to look forward to each day, and, regardless of what I may say to the contrary, I do take that responsibility very seriously. So, don’t worry. Things will be back to normal soon enough.

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  1. dorothy
    Posted March 14, 2006 at 9:13 am | Permalink

    i got the shock of my life when i tried to access your site yesterday and was told i was “forbidden!” WTF i spent the day agonizing about how i had offended you to the point that you would forbid me to read your comments. i’m so happy that it was just the company that was fucked, not me. whew!

  2. schutzman
    Posted March 14, 2006 at 10:02 am | Permalink

    If I may paraphrase the classic line from Blazing Saddles,

    “Mark Maynard, I heard you was hung!”

  3. Tony Buttons Esq.
    Posted March 14, 2006 at 1:14 pm | Permalink

    The use of the word “forbidden” seemed kind of biblical to me. Maybe, I thought, in the modern retelling, the serpent’s apple could be a blog.

  4. Dirtgrain
    Posted March 14, 2006 at 2:24 pm | Permalink

    You’re really naive sometimes. That is standard operating procedure for an FBI surveillance mission. You’re cooked. Just start praising Bush in every post, convincingly–the FBI can detect sarcasm.

    By the way, are you hearing any strange clicking noises or static when you use your telephone?

  5. Dr Cherry
    Posted March 14, 2006 at 7:04 pm | Permalink

    I think Mark deserves big props for handling this latest website-related problem like a weathered pro. I got burned the other day with a “forbidden” outage and started shopping for hosting right away. At the moment I’ve set up a test blog at the new hosting company and everything looks cool so far.

    The FBI can detect sarcasm?!

  6. mark
    Posted March 14, 2006 at 9:36 pm | Permalink

    I think he was just being sarcastic, Steve.

    And, while we’re on the subject of paranoia, there’s a fairly well-done film on the unanswered questions on 911 available online. (Thanks to Chuck for the tip).

  7. Dr Cherry
    Posted March 15, 2006 at 12:02 am | Permalink

    Mark, you wouldn’t be a very good FBI agent because you didn’t detect my sarcasm.

  8. mark
    Posted March 15, 2006 at 6:58 am | Permalink

    Actually, I think I’m a quite good FBI agent. I have, after all, been able to work my way into the potentially dangerous fringe groups like the Hamtramck Star. (On my last mission, I even verified the existence of Muslims in Hamtramck.)

  9. Dirtgrain
    Posted March 16, 2006 at 9:38 am | Permalink

    Liar! Everybody knows that the FBI doesn’t call them Muslims–they call them heathens. Duh.

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