tumbling down the birth canal

I had an absolutely horrible idea just now. Actually, I think it was a great idea, but it occurred to me that it might have hurt my moms feelings, so I wont be doing it. Anyway, heres the idea I was thinking that it would be funny if I posted a photo of a Eurasian newborn here on my site, announcing that Linette and I had the baby at some point last night, during the early hours of Saturday, our due date. As I type that, it doesnt sound so funny, but I guess youd have to know my mom and how much shes been looking forward to this, her first grandchild. Shes been wanting a grandchild from Linette and me for the last twelve years. As I type this, her bags are packed and by the door of her home in Cincinnati, and she wants to know the minute Linette has her first contraction I just thought it would be kind of funny if she logged on (mom and dad found MM.com a few months ago), saw the photo, and thought that Id not only not told her that we’d goen to the hospital, but that we’d had the child and posted the photo on-line before even calling to tell her that shes a grandmother Like I said though, that would have been mean, so I didnt do it.

So, todays the due date and theres not much to report. Its raining outside, which is supposed to speed things along, but so far no big indications of things to come; no gushing of water, no trace of a mucus plug. So, were just sitting around the house and waiting for the baby to make the first move.

Its difficult for someone like me who over-plans and worries about every little detail to be just sitting here and waiting, with absolutely no idea as to when its all going to start. Linette says thats good for me. She might be right, but it doesnt make things any easier. I just want this part of it over with, all the worrying about Linette and the baby, all the stressing over the minutia that comes along with something like this. I just want to get the baby home so that we can get on with things, getting used to our new roles and schedules. (I know that this is wrong, by the way. I know that I shouldnt just want this beautiful thing to be over with. I know that I should be looking forward to the actual event, but theres just so much anxiety tied up in it. Im trying my best to just go with things as they happen, but its not easy.)

OK, Im going to go and clean our bathtub now. Ill try to write more later.

Someone just left a comment at my last post, explaining how to get past the security system at St. Joes hospital here in Ypsi in order to steal extra food from the supply closet Even though we wont be giving birth at St. Joes, Ive never been happier about having this blog. I think its so cool that people out there would share that kind of stuff with me. Thats so fucking cool Of course, it also occurred to me that it could have been a setup. Someone out there could be looking to catch me in some kind of elaborate sting operation. Im sure theres more than one person out there in the audience who would like to see me get arrested for grabbing a handful of granola bars on what should be the happiest day of my life.