The Landline sofa

A few days ago, I put out word through various channels that we were looking for a beautiful, mid-century modern sofa, preferably teal in color, for the front lobby of Landline Creative Labs, hoping that someone might come forward with something breathtakingly beautiful. Well, that didn’t happen.

So, for the time being, this will be our main sofa. It was acquired this afternoon about an hour north of Ypsi from the owners of an isolated house, at the end of a long dirt road, decorated exclusively in animal skulls and driftwood. At some point, if the opportunity should present itself, we may trade up, or have it reupholstered. In the meantime, though, this is it.

Let this be a warning to all you would be developers… Maybe sure you leave enough in your budget to afford furniture.

I should note, lest anyone be too afraid, that we are having it steam cleaned.

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  1. Jean Henry
    Posted March 27, 2017 at 9:06 am | Permalink

    Oh my…. You’re not very good at this. I suspect a more suitable replacement will be found within a few weeks. It does have some soiled curb mattress-like character…

  2. anonymous
    Posted March 27, 2017 at 9:15 am | Permalink

    Just flip the cushions and you’ll be fine. It’s got character.

  3. Eel
    Posted March 27, 2017 at 9:23 am | Permalink

    A couch isn’t a true couch until it’s seen both birth and death.

    This looks like a true couch.

  4. Citywatch
    Posted March 27, 2017 at 9:29 am | Permalink

    Why not contact Tyner’s Warehouse on Michigan Avenue east of Ypsi downtown and ask if they have anything suitable that they might donate to a fledgling Ypsilanti Business?!?!
    Also ask the ladies at Bona Sera where they got theirs?

  5. Tommy
    Posted March 27, 2017 at 9:30 am | Permalink

    That couch is disgusting. I don’t think that is what you want clients and others sitting on in your front lobby. Get rid of it before you open up shop. Just a suggestion – it’s your business and you can do what you want. But seriously, it looks gross. Hope you don’t mind the honesty.

  6. C.H.
    Posted March 27, 2017 at 9:37 am | Permalink

    Chill the fuck out, everyone, Mark knows what he’s doing.

  7. grandma
    Posted March 27, 2017 at 10:13 am | Permalink

    HELL NO!!!!

  8. MJ
    Posted March 27, 2017 at 10:21 am | Permalink

    Burn that fucking thing.

  9. Citywatch
    Posted March 27, 2017 at 10:21 am | Permalink

    By the way, a big “NO” on the couch you found. No way to treat customers or a new business. Grandma and I agree. NO!!
    Try Tyners warehouse.

  10. Gillian
    Posted March 27, 2017 at 10:30 am | Permalink

    Oh dear god. I was really hoping that was photoshopped. The curb sofa I found for you was much nicer.

  11. facebook stalker
    Posted March 27, 2017 at 10:42 am | Permalink

    Mark on Facebook: “It’ll be OK everyone. Stop freaking out. It’s a placeholder. And it’ll be lovely.”

  12. Rob
    Posted March 27, 2017 at 1:28 pm | Permalink

    I’m usually a fan of repurposing and recycling, and have dived a few dumpsters in my day, BUT hell no to that abomination above.

  13. Tommy
    Posted March 27, 2017 at 1:36 pm | Permalink

    Dude – if the Corner Brewery can crowd fund a new kitchen and think nothing of it, you can surely raise $500 or so for a new couch and maybe a coffee table with a magazine or two on it – unless you are going for an aesthetic of which I am not quite familiar.

    Again – hope you don’t mind the honestly. If you still have a dumpster on site, put this in it.

  14. Gillian
    Posted March 27, 2017 at 1:56 pm | Permalink

    this looks like a cry for help. everything okay over there?

  15. BW
    Posted March 27, 2017 at 2:00 pm | Permalink

    I love that there is one “clean” cushion. It really accentuates the je ne sais quoi of the whole scene.

  16. Gillian
    Posted March 27, 2017 at 2:02 pm | Permalink

    we used to have couches like that at my summer camp. disgusting and comfy as hell. one day the board president visited and promptly threw them all in the garbage. 15-year-old me was livid. 35-year-old me would have done the exact same thing.

  17. Stacey
    Posted March 27, 2017 at 5:28 pm | Permalink

    That is not sexy.

  18. dennis m
    Posted March 27, 2017 at 9:41 pm | Permalink

    Procuring a new couch was your American Health Care Act.

    You fucked it up.

    You are humiliated.

    No one is even sure you can govern now.

  19. Posted March 27, 2017 at 10:18 pm | Permalink

    What if I told you this was not, in fact, our couch?

  20. stupid hick
    Posted March 27, 2017 at 10:31 pm | Permalink

    You rented the couch from Stewart Beal. Good luck.

  21. Posted March 28, 2017 at 6:56 am | Permalink

    We do own the couch. And we are considering the possibility of having it reupholstered. But it won’t be the main lobby couch. We got something from Carol at Salt City Antiques in downtown Ypsi. So you can all rest easy.

  22. Jean Henry
    Posted March 28, 2017 at 8:17 am | Permalink

    Before reupholstering open up one of the cushions and inspect the condition of the filling. It may be stained or seriously degraded. You definitely don;t want to slip cover over those things. The stain will lift right into the new ones. Glad you found something suitable.

  23. Lynne
    Posted March 28, 2017 at 12:24 pm | Permalink

    Man. I love that Salt City Antiques store, fwiw. I am sure whatever they gave you is a HUGE improvement :)

  24. TeacherPatti
    Posted March 29, 2017 at 8:07 pm | Permalink

    I bet there’s a million dollars stuffed in the cushions, Mark! Some old crank who grew up in the Depression stuffed his bills in that couch. Clenching a five cent cigar between his lips, he chuckled at all of us saps who used the “banks” and the “credit unions”. But since he realized that people suck, the old crank knew he had to keep away burglars and those who would take his money from that couch. So he peed. And peed and peed and peed to keep the bad guys away. And it worked! The money is still there for anyone brave enough to dig through decades of caked on, soaked on urine.

    Yeah I’m just making shit up. For real brah, get a new couch.

One Trackback

  1. By Introducing the new Landline couch on March 30, 2017 at 10:05 pm

    […] Thanks to our friends at Salt City Antiques, Landline Creative Labs now has a couch that doesn’t make people recoil in horror. […]

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