The other night Linette and I had dinner with our friends Andy and Patti. During the course of the meal, they urged me to follow my dreams and start up that Jim Jarmusch pooping site that I used to talk about. I don’t know that it’s a great business idea, but I do very much like the idea of having an army of people with cell phones fanned out around the world, just waiting to catch the director in a public restroom. I’ve even got the website design worked out in my mind. The front page is very simple. It’s just a close-up image of his feet, and his bunched-up pants, under the metal door of a men’s room stall. (Perhaps there’s a wisp of smoke curling out along the bottom edge of the door. Maybe you can see a shock of white hair in the crack between the door and the wall.) Then, there would be links to other pages, where people could post their personal, “I just listened to Jim Jarmusch poop” stories, and upload audio from their cell phones. (Andy very much liked the idea of posting detailed pooping transcripts as well.) I’d hate to force the director into changing his bathroom habits, but I do like the idea of having an army of people out there on the streets, just waiting for their chance to speed-dial the site and document his evacuations.
I know that if I changed the subject of the project to someone a little less obscure, like Donald Trump, it would get a lot more attention, butI don’t think it would be as interesting. Capturing Jim Jarmusch pooping is art.
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I think in order for it to be successful as a business, you’d have to widen the scope a bit. You could call it,
If only I had known. He frequents a popular Thai restaurant/dive near City Hall/Chinatown, I have seen him there and given he is eating possibly has the chance to see him “poop”.
This whole thing started about a year ago when another reader of this site happened to see him ducking into a stall in the men’s room of an office building in New York. (He thought that perhaps they were seeing the same therapist.) Anyway, he lamented not having a recording device of some type, and that’s how the whole idea came about. I do think there’s a great idea in there, but, given all the other, more critical, things that need to be done in the world, I don’t think I could justify spending time on it. Plus, I’d hate to single out Jarmusch… even though I tried to watch his last film “Coffee and Cigarettes” last night and had to turn it off. It was, perhaps appropriately, absolutely execrable.