yummy, yummy prairie muffins, always hot and ready

According to the magazine The American Conservative, “Bush carried the 19 states with the highest white fertility, and 25 out of the top 26, with highly unionized Michigan being the one blue exception to the rule.” It’s been suggested by my friends at Metafilter, that some of this might be directly attributable to the growing popularity among fundamentalists of so-called “full quiver Christianity,” in which couples go out of their way to have as many children as the good Lord sees fit to bless them with. While I would maintain that the practitioners of this belief, like Michelle and Jim Bob Duggar, have every right to do this, I personally don’t think it’s responsible to act like selfish fucking jackasses and by putting more of a burden on the world’s already dwindling resources. As I suspect that a good many progressives feel the same way that I do about this, and practice responsible family planning, however, it doesn’t look as though we’ll ever win another election. So, I’m suggesting that we either need to 1) stop using birth control at the Democratic orgies, or 2) start thinking of ways to lure the kids of the fundamentalists over to the side of reason (maybe invite them to the orgies)… Regardless of the politics of fertility, there might be good news on the horizon for old mother earth though. It looks like the next wave of the bird flu could wipe out a significant percentage of the human race… (Thanks to Mike at Caliblog for the Adbusters link on over-consumption.)

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  1. Posted December 3, 2004 at 12:25 pm | Permalink

    Great ad-busters. Thanks. It drove me nuts how he wasn’t taken seriously.

  2. the one and only Mr. Tony Danza
    Posted December 3, 2004 at 1:45 pm | Permalink

    My Thanksgiving-inspired Puritan fantasies are slowly giving way to an all-consuming hunger for prairie muffins!

    P.S. I am not really Tony Danza.

  3. Posted December 3, 2004 at 8:42 pm | Permalink

    The only comforting thing is that these “uverbreeders” tend to have offspring who are too scared to leave their electoral birth state. The Red states may get more crimson, but they won’t bleed into us. I knew people in Texas and Tennessee who never left their home state.

    The House might have to have to add a committee on Downs Syndrome just for the 14th and 15th red siblings.

  4. Ken
    Posted December 5, 2004 at 8:27 am | Permalink

    Mark, you better get busy if you are even gonna get anywhere near 15 little liberals running around your house.

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