Tag Archives: Mark’s penis

Happy first birthday Arlo Lao Maynard

A year ago yesterday, Linette and I we welcomed our son Arlo into the world. Like his sister, once he made up his mind that he wanted to join us, he came shooting down the birth canal like a rocket. I think I must have mentioned it here before, but, eight years ago, when Linette […]

Posted in Mark's Life, Photographs, Uncategorized | Also tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 17 Comments

To the gentleman in the Panera restroom, I’m sorry if I terrified and/or aroused you

As I try to narrate everything possible for the benefit of my 10 month old son, Arlo, I constantly find myself saying things that I wouldn’t normally say in the course of an ordinary day. I say things like, “Daddy is fully extending his pale, white arm, to scratch the ear of the old, grey […]

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Tonight’s blogging has been preempted by a toilet repair emergency

Apparently we exceeded our lifetime flush capacity and blew out the inner workings of our toilet tonight, so I’m desperately trying to reconstruct it from scavenged parts. (At this point, I was going to suggest that I was in the process of using said toilet, while heroically trying to fix it at the same time, […]

Posted in Local Business, Mark's Life, Uncategorized | Also tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 10 Comments

Ypsilanti City government takes a stand on my penis

A few days ago, at lunch, I received a strange call. Ypsi’s new City Manager had somehow gotten his hands on my cell phone number. He was calling to apologize. I can’t remember his exact words, but he said something like, “Uhhhh… The City just launched a new website, and, somehow, it was hacked. You […]

Posted in Mark's Life, Ypsilanti | Also tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 22 Comments

In defense of my beautiful body… majestic penis

Last night, in a post about a new bar in Ypsi, I noted my dislike of trough urinals. This admission attracted the following comment from an Ypsilantian by the name of Karen. If you’re ashamed of your penis that much, you should get a catheter for when you go out to eat. In a later […]

Posted in Mark's Life, Uncategorized | Also tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 36 Comments

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