“Honk if You Love Donald Trump!”

A few days ago, I was listening to the punk rock classic Anarchy is Stupid in my car, when it occurred to me that it might be time to revisit the underlying conceit of the song. For those of you who aren’t well versed in rock and roll history, the song was recorded live almost 30 years ago, here in Ann Arbor, by the criminally under-appreciated band Prehensile Monkey-tailed Skink, and, like much of their music, it’s not only incredibly juvenile, but deliberately confrontational in both style and substance. The song starts with one of the band members yelling, “How many of you out there think the system sucks?”, and “How many of you think anarchy is better?”, only to be answered each time with enthusiastic shouts of assent from the crowd. Then, as the crowd waits for what’s next — knowing that they’re about to be whipped up into an antisocial, window-smashing frenzy — the band yells back, “Well, you’re stupid”, sucking every last bit on energy out of the room… Well, as I was sitting there in my car, thinking about this, it occurred to me that Trump supporters probably deserve a similar fate to those kids, who, back in ’92, espoused anarchy without really understanding what it was that they were championing.

I’m still not exactly sure what form this should take, but I suppose it could start with a giant MAGA-red banner on Washtenaw Avenue, right between Ypsilanti’s incredibly phallic water tower and the Eastern Michigan University (EMU) campus, inviting Trump supporters to proudly lay on their horns to demonstrate their loyalty. [Maybe it could say something like, “Let the America-hating academics at EMU hear what real patriotism sounds like!”] Then, about a thousand feet down Washtenaw, just as cars are coming over the top of the hill, I’m imaging that there could be another sign, essentially saying, “Well, you’re stupid.”

I like the idea. And I want to do it. But there’s one thing stopping me. And that’s the fact that, while it might feel good to lure Trump supporters into a trap like this, and then laugh at them, it wouldn’t do anyone any good… I’m guessing, at best, we might get a few good photos of Trump supporters shaking their fists and yelling out their windows upon seeing the second sign, or maybe a video of one of them launching into a racist rant, but nothing meaningful would come of it. And that’s kind of what I’m puzzling over tonight.

I’m wondering how this idea could, with a little work, be turned into something positive. For instance, what if, instead of a sign saying, “You’re stupid”, there was a sign that said something like, “If you honked, we have therapists who can help.” OK, maybe that wouldn’t work, but I do like the idea of big white tent full of social workers volunteering to help people start their deprogramming. Or, how about this… What if the second sign just said, “If you honked, we now have your license plate number and your photo, and you’re going to be assigned to one of Obama’s deep state reeducation camps.” OK, that would be mean-spirited. We don’t want to antagonize these folks, and further stoke the fires of paranoia… I think it has to be something kind. Something that invites introspection. Something that doesn’t just shout, “Gotcha!”, as gratifying as that might be. But I still haven’t figured out what that might be.

OK, I’m going keep thinking about it, but it’s time for me to introduce my son to Sterling Hayden right now, so you’ll have to start the brainstorming session without me.

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29 Comments

  1. Jean Henry
    Posted August 29, 2019 at 8:49 pm | Permalink

    Anarchy is stupid, but Emma Goldman was very smart.

  2. Dave Morris
    Posted August 29, 2019 at 10:20 pm | Permalink

    You could set up the punch line Burma Shave style….

    “well he’s”

    “sapping”

    ” and impurifying”

    “your precious”

    “bodily fluids”

  3. John Brown
    Posted August 30, 2019 at 6:55 am | Permalink

    Thats about the most harmless revenge fantasy I’ve ever heard. At least make a couple crash and burn, or puncture their car tires or something. Thats some passive shit.

  4. Eel
    Posted August 30, 2019 at 8:32 am | Permalink

    Agreed, JB. The post should have ended, “The minute they honk, snipers set up on the ridge of the hill, immediately take out the drivers of the vehicles.” #sarcasm

  5. Janette
    Posted August 30, 2019 at 8:54 am | Permalink

    Revenge fantasy with therapist safety net is adorable. Also, “The song was recorded live almost 30 years ago, here in Ann Arbor, by the criminally under-appreciated band Prehensile Monkey-tailed Skink” might just be my new favorite sentence.

  6. DavidI
    Posted August 30, 2019 at 9:23 am | Permalink

    I struggle over the same thoughts. What difference would it make? I’m not going to change anyone’s mind. We scratch our heads and end up doing nothing, even a harmless funny joke seems too much.

    Meanwhile in Hong Kong they are taking over airports and thousands (if not millions) flood the streets in protest, risking arrest and death.

    We have much to learn about resistance.

  7. anonymous
    Posted August 30, 2019 at 9:30 am | Permalink

    HW and the Proud Boys will show up ready to fuck shit up if anyone fucks with them.

  8. iRobert
    Posted August 30, 2019 at 10:02 am | Permalink

    You should listen to better music.

  9. dogmatic dolt
    Posted August 30, 2019 at 10:11 am | Permalink

    Aloha, Myself, I’m just glad that the Democratic Party is making sure we all know that they oppose our nations withdrawal from the nuclear arms control agreements with Russia, and will fight to ensure we don’t end up in another cold war–oh wait, other than Tulsi is anyone even addressing these issues. MAGA with yet more and newer nuclear weapons, both parties seem to be in agreement on that (buy remember Trump is a Putin Puppet).

    https://www.truthdig.com/articles/the-death-of-arms-control/

  10. John Brown
    Posted August 30, 2019 at 10:29 am | Permalink

    DD, David Duke (coincidence on the initials?) endorsed Tulsi. I’m not sure how one goes about getting endorsed by Nazis, but keep us posted on how she’s the only genuine Dem, and not at all just a disruptor. Keep in mind her intensions don’t mean a thing. Just bad Luck of the draw catching the eye of the fascist I guess.

  11. Frosted Flakes
    Posted August 30, 2019 at 10:36 am | Permalink

    Fake John Brown,

    Correct me if I am wrong. My understanding is that David Duke supported one aspect of her campaign and actually came out saying he did not endorse Tulsi. Not that it matters. Tulsi vocalized her rejection of any endorsement Duke might have for her.

    Do you know anything? If you do know something then correct me where I am wrong…

  12. iRobert
    Posted August 30, 2019 at 11:18 am | Permalink

    I wouldn’t be surprised if David Duke took a payoff to come out publically in favor of something Tulsi supports. Military contractors won’t let her get anywhere near the presidency. You can count on that.

  13. dogmatic dolt
    Posted August 30, 2019 at 4:03 pm | Permalink

    Aloha JB, you are of course right, it is all about personalities not policies
    I really am just a dolt

    JH gave me the name, I used to just wobblie around–but she could see right through to my core nature.

  14. Frosted Flakes
    Posted August 30, 2019 at 11:17 pm | Permalink

    Very possible iRobert. If true, then at least David Duke is only willing to do such a thing for money; whereas Fake John Brown is effectively doing the bidding of the military industrial complex for free.

    #chump

  15. Frosted Flakes
    Posted August 31, 2019 at 5:31 am | Permalink

    “Honk your big-red-nose if you pushed a Trump/Russia conspiracy theory for 3 years”

    “Well you are a clown”

  16. John Brown
    Posted August 31, 2019 at 6:23 am | Permalink

    Oh the deliberate blindness on Russia is amazing. Ukrainians who are struggling to stop pootin at Crimea, only to have agent orange try and pull their military aid this week see what is happening. Former spy’s see he a Ruskies stooge. G7 know he’s a Ruskies stooge. History will show he’s a Ruskies stooge. Denial is no doubt strongest in those who otherwise would have to admit complicity in treason. No real American would enable this treason. There’s a reckoning a coming.

  17. dogmatic dolt
    Posted August 31, 2019 at 7:30 am | Permalink

    Aloha JB, “There’s a reckoning a coming.” Nations that engage in illegal wars of aggression are frequently held to account by the rest of the world. Just like with Vietnam, as we continued to lose that worthless illegal war of aggression, the war mongers only solution was yet more illegal wars of aggression–Vietnam 1964, Cambodia 1970, Laos 1971, the US withdrawals 1973, US economy begins collapsing as war time inflation comes home (Ford’s Whip inflation Now program 1974) 1975 Democratic Republic of Vietnam troop enter Saigon and rename it Ho Chi Ming City, 1976 US economy in chaos, decouples completely from gold standard, and we become inextricable tied to the “petrol” dollar and the fossil fuel kingdom of Saudi Arabia and our foreign policy has been guided by them ever since.
    Jb, I bet if you try, you can see some 21st. century parallels in US aggression.
    How many more innocent people are you favor of killing JB to maintain our “moxy” in the world and to prop up the autocratic medieval regime in Arabia and our own home grown fossil fuel barons? The corporate Dems seem to think the answer is at least a trillion dollar cold war with Russia, maybe a shooting war with Iran. You are right a reckoning is coming.

    but being a Putin Puppet (you forgot that last time) David Duke supporting dolt, I clearly do not have a clue.

  18. dogmatic dolt
    Posted August 31, 2019 at 7:51 am | Permalink

    Aloha JB, since you seem to be as young as HW you probably are totally ignorant of economic events in the 70’s–double digit inflation (why we had the whip inflation now gardens among other economic innovations) and double digit unemployment. The economy was in such chaos as we lost the wars that we had numerous nation wide strikes involving 100,000 of workers. If you bother to look at and understand the economic data for the last half century, you will there has been no increase in the American workers standard of living in that half century–it is what happens when you loose a war. The future does not look to bright.

  19. Jean Henry
    Posted August 31, 2019 at 11:15 am | Permalink

    Donald Trump is funnier on a daily basis than any joke about him. His infomercial for Trump resort (parking! no bedbugs!) at the G7 was better than any SNL parody. He tweeted 49 times in an hour and a half this morning. That’s what the leader of the free world does before golfing. It will all seem as funny as it really is once he’s good and gone.

  20. Jean Henry
    Posted August 31, 2019 at 11:19 am | Permalink

    FF__“Honk your big-red-nose if you pushed a Trump/Russia conspiracy theory for 3 years”

    One word: Benghazi

    Ok two: Emails

    Has anyone compared the time and manpower spent on Benghazi v the Trump- Russia connection? That would be interesting to see.

  21. Hyborian Warlord
    Posted August 31, 2019 at 12:19 pm | Permalink

    Benghazi was a horrible fuckup by Clinton though and she paid for the made up Trump/Russia shit.

  22. Jean Henry
    Posted September 1, 2019 at 6:42 am | Permalink

    And she’s not funny.

  23. Hyborian Warlord
    Posted September 1, 2019 at 10:48 am | Permalink

    Prolly doesn’t even like turtles. Did you know I like turtles? I like turtles.

  24. Jean Henry
    Posted September 1, 2019 at 2:19 pm | Permalink

    I like turtles too. I saw a Blanding’s turtle on a walk this summer. It was right in our path next to a swamp. I thought it was a smooth almost black river stone for a minute. A Highlight of the summer.

  25. Hyborian Warlord
    Posted September 1, 2019 at 2:28 pm | Permalink

    Nods in acknowledgment…

    “…turtles…”

  26. Hyborian Warlord
    Posted September 1, 2019 at 6:45 pm | Permalink

    One of my nature highlights of the year was the peregrine falcon perching on the post in the front yard seeming to peer into the window at us for several minutes. Then there was our discovery of Lightning Bug Lane at a hidden-in-plain-sight location in Ypsi. That was a cool experience to have over and over for weeks.

  27. Jean Henry
    Posted September 1, 2019 at 7:25 pm | Permalink

    We had osprey, two bald eagles and a bunch of great herons and the standard pack of sand hill cranes out here in Whitmore Lake. And yesterday I saw a little blue heron in Ann Arbor on the river, one of my favorite birds. It’s neck retracts like a turtle so it goes from elegant to squat depending on whether it’s actively fishing or hiding.

  28. Jean Henry
    Posted September 1, 2019 at 7:28 pm | Permalink

    Sorry must have been a little green heron. It didn’t look at all green but the light was bright. Only the third time I’ve seen one here, each time many years apart on the same piece of river.

  29. Jean Henry
    Posted September 1, 2019 at 7:33 pm | Permalink

    https://youtu.be/3Lz10KHs4Vs

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