It’s now been about 30 hours since I’ve eaten, and 20 since I’ve left the small area of my home where I’ve been quarantined, and the flu is finally beginning to pay dividends. I’m starting to have brilliant visions. The most recent one involves Mitch Albom. It occurred to me that, if I could somehow raise a million dollars, I could afford to put billboards in cities across America asking, “What will you give us for Mitch Albom?” I’m not sure what his trade value is on the open market at this point, but I’ve got to think that some state in the south with a rapidly aging population might see him as a commodity. The question is, what could a sate like Arizona possibly give us in return?
16 Comments
I’d be good with trading him for an asshole to be named later.
Death really wasn’t so bad. To be honest, I kind of welcomed it after all of those Tuesdays with Mitch.
“Oh so sensitive and caring” Mitch crossed the picket line during the Detroit Free Press strike, stabbing his co-workers in the back. He is, and will be to the day he dies, a low-life SCAB.
If you didn’t hate him already, check out this quote on gay marriage from his last column in the Free Press: “In the end, folks just don’t want to feel threatened or bullied. Many gays have long felt bullied by society; many heterosexuals now feel bullied by a new ideology.”
…. More like a ” Tuesday with Morrie” Mitch the genius will fill in the rest….
I’d accept a carton of smokes and a bag of glass beads.
The capacity of his head is enormous. I think I could fit two of mine into one of his.
A better billboard: “How many marbles could you fit in Mitch Albom’s head?”
Funny you should mention him. It was just announced today that he got another movie deal.
“Warner Bros. has acquired Mitch Albom’s ‘The First Phone Call from Heaven’ for the big screen. Set in Michigan, the novel tells the story of a small town whose citizens start receiving calls from the afterlife….”
http://www.freep.com/article/20140326/ENT01/303260162
I’d be happy with a pile of smallpox blankets for Mitch.
Mitch Albom’s advice to a black girl rejected from college: “…if she really wants to change things, she can create a two-parent, high-standards home for her own children…”
He was on CBS Sunday Morning this weekend with Jane Pauley.
Watch the interview:
http://www.cbsnews.com/news/mitch-albom-on-life-charity-and-god/
The BS this guy writes, 3rd grade level books that sell. I heard he hung out with Dave Barry and Stephen King. Almost like some flunky street guitarist hanging out with Keith Richards and Jerry Garcia. Tuesdays with Boring compared to the Shining? Or Misery or Shawshank Redemption or People you meet in Heaven, then a buddhist or muslim is there? What a pud.
Mitch Albom is the worst writer every. He is known for writing columns on events before they actually happen. I guess, that’s why he is so good at writing fiction.
Hey Mitch, please go suck a sick dick. Better yet, have you wife suck a sick dick, then spit the cum in your mouth. You piece of shit!
His arrogance and ego is astronomical. I could imagine one entering his home, in the Foyer would be two times sized full portrait of himself, similar to Napolean’s, he would measure 2 x 4′ tall or 8′, the ears would not fit in the frame. The rest of his home would be photos and autgraphs of himself with celebrities and little mementos and awards, reminding the guest or relative, ‘you are nothing, he is Great’. Mitch’s Tue with Morrie, is not even a full novel in length, reads more like 6th grade level public school and was full of mush. I am sure everyone he meets, especially about people bad off, he is always thinking, ‘old man, cancer, or ALS, or sick, this could make me a good book, I am going to form the relationship with that in mind’ . Mitch is a nobody. His stories go to Hallmark, directed by Joe Filmschool Recent Grad. Whereas, Steinbeck, Stephen King, and the rest are done by the Greats. Mitch is Garbage.
I love it when old posts come back to the front page. Thanks, Fred, for bringing this flu-induced classic back from the great beyond.
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