Shadow Art Fair preview: Black Metal Bicycle

One of the things I’m most looking forward to at this Saturday’s Shadow Art Fair is my friend Andy Claydon’s Black Metal Bicycle. Andy and I have been discussing the idea for weeks, but I didn’t get word, until just a few days ago, that all of his tinkering had finally payed off, and that, using his wife’s bicycle, he’d finally been successful in creating a human-powered death metal generator. I asked for video evidence of this astounding scientific accomplishment, and received the following in response, along with a note saying that anyone desiring to ride it at the Shadow would first have to sign a waiver acknowledging the possibility that, by mounting the bike, “the Jesus could be ripped from your heart.”

Andy always does good work for the Shadow, but I think he’s really outdone himself for this one, knowing that it’s the last.

Also, Andy tells me that it’s wired to record, so, after the Shadow, he’ll be posting some of the more incredible tracks generated by fair-goers to the web.

Oh, and he asked me to let you know that the bike plays five chords. When asked why five, Andy responded, “Since The Ramones made a career out of three, I figured five was plenty.”

[And, yes, I’ve already started begging Andy to bring the Black Metal Bicycle to this year’s Krampus festivities…. We just need to find a way to make it mobile, so that it can lead our midnight parade through town.]

This entry was posted in Art and Culture, Shadow Art Fair, Ypsilanti and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Post a comment or leave a trackback: Trackback URL.

11 Comments

  1. Bob Krzewinski
    Posted July 17, 2013 at 9:58 pm | Permalink

    Will the Black Metal Bike trigger seizures for all that view it at the Shadow Art Fair????

  2. Posted July 17, 2013 at 10:09 pm | Permalink

    One can only hope.

  3. AndyC
    Posted July 17, 2013 at 11:12 pm | Permalink

    Bob, I’ll be sure to add “seizures” to the waiver right after Parvo. Any other side effect anyone can think of, please let me know so I can add them to the list. This is going to read like a software agreement.

  4. Mr. X
    Posted July 18, 2013 at 7:44 am | Permalink

    Anal leakage.
    Dizziness.
    Inverse rapture.
    Demonic possession.

  5. anonymous
    Posted July 18, 2013 at 8:15 am | Permalink

    Scrotal swelling.
    Scrotal shrinkage.
    Labial engorgement.
    Shortness of breath.
    Suicidal thoughts.

  6. Ted
    Posted July 18, 2013 at 8:25 am | Permalink

    WARNING: Riding could result in back, oily ejaculate.

  7. 734
    Posted July 18, 2013 at 10:01 am | Permalink

    weeping wounds

  8. 734
    Posted July 18, 2013 at 10:02 am | Permalink

    sphincter seizures

  9. AndyC
    Posted July 18, 2013 at 10:50 am | Permalink

    Hope the wife doesn’t read these.

  10. Eel
    Posted July 18, 2013 at 12:55 pm | Permalink

    This bike will have to be melted down afterward and dropped into the deepest part of Lake Michigan. It is cursed forever.

  11. BBD
    Posted July 18, 2013 at 2:32 pm | Permalink

    Well…. this is interesting! Thanks Mr. Andy Claydon! I wish your band was playing though! Honestly, that was the best thing I saw last year. Hands. Down. Fucking. Awesome.

    Sad that this is going to be the last SAF, though I understand the reasons why it is coming to a close. Great things can’t last forever. Congratulations on an amazing and inspiring run.

3 Trackbacks

  1. By Shadow Art Fair 2013 on July 21, 2013 at 9:44 pm

    […] predicted, Andy Claydon’s Black Metal Bicycle was the huge hit of the evening. Here we see our resident philosopher, Thom Elliott, peddling to […]

  2. By More Shadow Art Fair highlights on July 23, 2013 at 9:13 pm

    […] have two things that I’d like to share with you. The first is audio from Andy Claydon’s Black Metal Bicycle, and the second is video of a giant cat that attempted to make its way into the beer garden before […]

  3. By Ypsilanti’s Heritage Fest parade on August 19, 2013 at 7:55 am

    […] next year… Just imagine someone dressed like Darwin furiously peddling Andy Claydon’s black metal bicycle and singing about how Creationism is […]

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Connect

Sidetrack ad Aubree’s ad BUY LOCAL... or shop at Amazon through this link Banner Initiative Cherewick 2