Totally Quotable Linette: ballless dog to the neck edition

Occasionally, Linette will wake up in the morning, angry at me about something that I’d done in a dream that she’d had. This morning, I awoke to the accusation that I’d thrown a puppy, that had just chewed its own balls off, into her neck.

If there are any dream interpretation folks out there, I’d welcome your thoughts.

And, yes, we sleep in separate beds, like on I Love Lucy.

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  1. Edward
    Posted November 3, 2011 at 8:16 am | Permalink

    I hate to break it to you, but I believe you are the puppy that chewed off your own testicles.

  2. K2
    Posted November 3, 2011 at 8:25 am | Permalink

    I disagree. I think that you are the testicles.

  3. Grandma
    Posted November 3, 2011 at 10:23 am | Permalink

    Do you think it has anything to do with the in-laws coming for a visit????

  4. Mr. X
    Posted November 3, 2011 at 11:14 am | Permalink

    This one is pretty easy. She holds you responsible for the baby in her belly. She’s angry. It feels as though you’ve thrown it at her. As for the ball nibbling, I think she’s subconsciously wondering whether the baby she’s carrying is a boy or a girl.

  5. Tommy
    Posted November 3, 2011 at 11:15 am | Permalink

    Now that is something I would like to see on the top of this website instead of your sweaty, unshaven mug!

  6. Eel
    Posted November 3, 2011 at 11:27 am | Permalink

    What, Tommy, the image of a baby without balls being thrown into a woman’s neck?

  7. Ypsiosaurus Wrecks
    Posted November 3, 2011 at 12:16 pm | Permalink

    I agree with Ed, I would interpret this as you being an impotent (ball-less) pain in her neck.

    Why you disclose strange personal anecdotes is a mystery to me.

  8. Tommy
    Posted November 3, 2011 at 12:21 pm | Permalink

    If you have seen some of mark’s other ‘art’, that would seem to fit right in.

  9. Elf
    Posted November 3, 2011 at 12:56 pm | Permalink

    I’m tempted to put “chewed off testicles” into Google, but I’m afraid of what I may find.

  10. Posted November 3, 2011 at 9:10 pm | Permalink

    Linette is about 34 weeks into the pregnancy now, which, if I’m not mistaken is when the baby decides wether or not to chew off its balls and become a girl.

  11. HH
    Posted November 3, 2011 at 11:35 pm | Permalink

    I love the idea that all babies are boys to stare with, but that some decide to chew their balls off to become girls. I think I’m going to tell my students that.

  12. b
    Posted November 4, 2011 at 3:21 pm | Permalink

    i think this is the funniest thing i’ve ever read…..

  13. Mr. X
    Posted November 4, 2011 at 3:28 pm | Permalink

    If people are willing to believe that the earth is only 6000 years old, that evolution isn’t real, and that people coexisted with dinosaurs, I don’t see why they wouldn’t believe that baby girls, while in the womb, gnawed their balls off.

  14. Futliarnost
    Posted November 5, 2011 at 12:37 am | Permalink

    Well, think of this. What if we consider every character in her dream to be a facet of her own personality. The part of her personality that she associates with pet-like-ness is ball-less. You are throwing her ball-lessness at her neck. She is angry with you/her. Have you ever beaten her because you blamed her for not being a hermaphrodite?
    Maybe she is hoping the baby will not be a boy. It is a common notion that fathers have a special relationship to sons.

  15. Futliarnost
    Posted November 6, 2011 at 1:31 am | Permalink

    And the neck is sort of a control area for power couples like you. You ever notice how Tom Cruise used to grab Katie by the neck? That was to show he was in control.

  16. Edward
    Posted November 6, 2011 at 9:26 am | Permalink

    To dream that you see your own neck, foretells that vexatious family relations will interfere with your business. To admire the neck of another, signifies your worldly mindedness will cause broken domestic ties. For a woman to dream that her neck is thick, foretells that she will become querulous and something of a shrew if she fails to control her temper.

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