Can anyone be the Assistant Attorney General of Michigan?

For those of you not in the great state of Michigan, it looks as though our Assistant Attorney General, a guy by the name of Andrew Shirvell, has been caught in the act of cyber bullying. It would seem that Shirvell, under the pseudonym, “Concerned Michigan Alumnus,” has spent these past several months lashing out online against a University of Michigan undergraduate by the name of Chris Armstrong, who is presently serving as the first openly gay president of the Michigan Student Assembly. Going to the extent of calling Armstrong “Satan’s representative on the student council,” Shirvell has launched a site to keep tabs on Armstrong and his “radical gay agenda.” The site, called Chris Armstrong Watch, demonstrates, if nothing else, that Shirvell is clearly unhinged. Shrivell even goes so far as to stand outside Armstrong’s Ann Arbor home at 1:30 in the morning with a camera, after calling the cops to report a “gay orgy” in progress. The photos of bored cops standing on a porch, I guess, are meant to somehow convince us that radical gay indoctrination program has been taking place inside. Instead, however, it just makes me think back to 1978 and Harvey Milk’s assassination at the hands of a clearly obsessed Dan White. Maybe it’s just this interview with Anderson Coper, but something doesn’t seem right with this fellow, and I hope, for Armstrong’s sake, he gets the help he so clearly needs… Which brings me to the point of this post, which is, what does it take to become the Assistant Attorney General of Michigan? Having watched the interview of Shirvell with CNN’s Anderson Cooper, I think it’s safe to say that the bar is set pretty damned low. And I’m wondering if perhaps James O’Keefe or one of those recently let go Chrysler workers might be able to fill his role once it becomes available. Seriously, though, is the role of Assistant Attorney General typically filled by a political operative?

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22 Comments

  1. Josh
    Posted September 29, 2010 at 11:41 pm | Permalink

    he stalks the kid’s facebook! his mom jokingly references a fake ID and he says the kid’s FOAMING AT THE MOUTH towards the police.

    what a dumb asshole.

  2. dragon
    Posted September 29, 2010 at 11:55 pm | Permalink

    Transcript:

    CNN prop: How did you discover what was going on at your ol’ Alma mater?

    Shrivill: Well, I went to this party, which unbeknown to me turns out to be a gay orgy, and I went incognito, you know wearing a suit and tie, when all of the sudden these homos had me backed into a corner and started sucking my cock, all I could think of was why are these fairies sucking my cock, and where did they get those fabulous boots.

  3. Posted September 30, 2010 at 12:46 am | Permalink

    This fanatic’s blog is pretty interesting reading, specifically that this kid, after specifically promising not to, apparently joined Michigamua (now called Order of Angell) the evil elitist secret society that performed bizarre rituals using stolen Native American artifacts in the tower of the Michigan Union.

    Also some hilarious bits: ‘In fact, while a student in high school, John Oltean was a member of a band DISGUSTINGLY called “Fetus for Breakfast.” ‘

    This whole turn of events definitely makes me feel a lot weirder about my plans to start a markmaynardwatch blog.

  4. Knox
    Posted September 30, 2010 at 6:07 am | Permalink

    Seriously, how can a guy like this hold an office as important as Asst Attorney General? I cannot fathom how it’s possible that this man has a say as to who is prosecuted in this state.

    I’m glad that Mike Cox didn’t win this Republican primary. I can’t image what this guy would have done if he were working in the office of the Governor.

  5. Robert
    Posted September 30, 2010 at 6:41 am | Permalink

    As I’ve said over and over very openly, Mike Cox is OWNED by organized crime. He is their lap dog and is as corrupt as they come and has been since his days in the Wayne County Prosecutor’s office. It shouldn’t surprise anybody that he’s packed his AG office with lunatic assholes like this Andrew Shirvell. Sane or decent people wouldn’t work for that prick – at least not for very long.

    Dragon’s instinct is right on, Shirvell’s mannerisms and behavior suggest he is struggling with his own homosexual impulses and an intense self-loathing which he currently feels the need to project onto Chris Armstrong.

    Judging from the particulars of Shirvell’s accusations toward Armstrong, my sense is that Shirvell engaged in some sort of homosexual experimentation as a college freshman and is now feeling it necessary to convince himself he was ‘tricked’ into it somehow by ‘real’ gays pushing an agenda.

    If he truly feels he was the victim of some sort of sexual coercion by classmates back at U of M, he should make a formal complaint. He is an assistant attorney general after all. What a fucking sick freak.

  6. Robert
    Posted September 30, 2010 at 7:04 am | Permalink

    …oh, and by the way, neither dragon, nor I, have any proof…as fucking usual.

  7. Tommy
    Posted September 30, 2010 at 8:27 am | Permalink

    After watching this piece, I had to counter it by watching Lewis Black’s rant about gays and their dangerous agenda. This guy makes me sick to my stomach. As for Mike Cox, what a puss. He should fire this guy immediately for cyber bullying as an example. And by the way – no doubt that Mr. Shirvell is gay as well.

  8. Andy C
    Posted September 30, 2010 at 9:36 am | Permalink

    Andrew Shirvell definitely so fucking GAY! This dude is sooo gonna come out in some gay scandal.

    “Obviously you’re obsessed with this young gay man.” -Anderson Cooper

  9. Oliva
    Posted September 30, 2010 at 10:44 am | Permalink

    His sheer doltishness, even without all that completely demented stuff, is troubling in itself. And how dispiriting to young people who believe in the value of a UM education.

  10. Robert
    Posted September 30, 2010 at 10:46 am | Permalink

    After Paul Reubens finishes his work on “EOS: The Movie” he could step right into the roll of Andrew Shirvell in the upcoming production “Mike Cox: Corrupt to the Core.” Reubens could just go with his Pee-Wee character for both and nail them both…maybe literally.

    I was thinking we’d cast Jack Osbourne and Jon Cryer as Mark Maynard at different stages in his life.

  11. lorie thom
    Posted September 30, 2010 at 10:59 am | Permalink

    Here is the thing – this guy was a stalker crazy guy in college (undergrad) at U of M – doesn’t anyone remember the “protest” at New York Pizza Depot about the “friendly” sticker they displayed. Just like the rainbow stickers all over Ypsi?

    So Mike Cox hired this guy with his Ave Maria law degree and is now protecting him. Don’t kid yourselves, he’d be fired in any other state but he’s got a guy protecting here. Trying to down play it but protecting him.

    This is really about Mike Cox’s terrible bigoted judgment not this goofball.

  12. arun
    Posted September 30, 2010 at 1:37 pm | Permalink

    As Christopher Hitchens just wrote of another likely suspect – “Set your watch and sit back, and pretty soon [he] will be found sprawling lustily on the floor of the men’s room.”
    I doubt Shirvell had an actual gay experience – more likely he was rejected by someone like Armstrong, who is way out of Shirvell’s league.

  13. TeacherPatti
    Posted September 30, 2010 at 2:14 pm | Permalink

    I’m not sure if the transcript quoted above is real (re: “fairies” just up and sucking his cock) but I gotta tell ya…if I was at a party and some person (guy or lady) just came up and starting licking “little Patti”, I’d beat the shit out of that person not out of homophobia, but because you have to at least take me out to dinner first. Sheesh.
    Seriously, is this guy for real??

  14. Tommy
    Posted September 30, 2010 at 2:24 pm | Permalink

    This just in:
    http://www.annarbor.com/news/university-of-michigan-student-body-president-seeks-restraining-order-against-assistant-state-attorn/

    Good.

  15. Meta
    Posted September 30, 2010 at 8:08 pm | Permalink

    AnnArbor.com has something on the story as well.

    http://www.annarbor.com/vielmetti/andrew-shirvell-vs-chris-armstrong/

  16. Where2stickit
    Posted September 30, 2010 at 9:54 pm | Permalink

    So if straight people obsessed with gay people are probably actually gay, what does that make us folks who are obsessed with straight people who are obsessed with gay people? (Given that the straight people obsessed with gay people are actually gay.)

    I need an answer in the next 45 minutes to an hour.

  17. Posted September 30, 2010 at 10:02 pm | Permalink

    I like to think Mark could play himself in the movie.

    Then again I have this mental image of Mark wearing a Charlie Brown style t-shirt as a kid version of himself.

    Not sure why.

    There is a “Fire Andrew Shirvell” facebook page that already has over 7,100 people on it. Not bad for a state this size in a few hours.

  18. Oliva
    Posted September 30, 2010 at 11:06 pm | Permalink

    Gay/straight is a simplifying construction, a handy classifying system, and we are apes who like to classify. So “us folks” is everybody. Quandary solved? (If only.)

  19. Robert
    Posted October 1, 2010 at 6:20 am | Permalink

    @arun: You may be right.

    @lorie thom: Agreed.

    @Where2stickit: Sorry I didn’t get back to you in time, but our obsession with closeted gays makes us “double-closeted” gays.

    By the way, Cox finally suspended the Shirvell, due entirely to public sentiment. He would never have done the right thing without that scrutiny. Cox is a dumb thug who has no business in law enforcement. He’s so mobbed up and preoccupied with doing favors for the Detroit Syndicate that he frequently forgets to keep up even the appearance of being a legal authority.

  20. Robert
    Posted October 2, 2010 at 5:07 pm | Permalink

    There is now also the issue of appeals on cases in which Mr. Shirvell was the prosecutor.

  21. Robert
    Posted October 4, 2010 at 10:06 am | Permalink

    I wish this would have known about all this a few months earlier. I would have tried to get Shirvell on the ballot as the GOP candidate for Attorney General.

  22. Roman Ias
    Posted November 18, 2010 at 2:18 pm | Permalink

    What is this man doing now that he has been fired? Is there a movement to see him disbarred in the state? I have searched the intertubes and found nothing.

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