Clementine found me working at the computer this afternoon, climbed up into my lap, and told me that she wanted to marry me. I explained that (because of the evil Republicans) we could only be married to one person, and that I was already married to her mother. She sat there quietly for a moment, considering what I’d told her, and then replied with what she saw as a compromise that would allow us to work around the rules. “Daddy,” she said, “I want to marry your hair.”
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Thanks to the power of science, ebay and the little junior mark we have incubating, Clementine’s wish may very well come true.
I was half expecting to wake up this morning to find myself bald, with her and my hair having eloped.
This is exactly why I keep my head shaved.
Great, strike “hair marrier” from the list.
I’m running out of unclaimed inoffensive pejoratives.
I don’t want to marry your hair, but I wouldn’t mind wining and dining it for a while, leaving the door open to possible romance. Does your hair have a profile up on Match.com?
Dude, your hair is SO gonna end up “Dateline”.
“Excuse me, mark’s hair. Please have a seat.”
“Uh, I was just here for a cut and blow… uh… I mean…”
“I’m going to read from your blog. Lemme see… uh… wow! There isn’t one interesting post on the whole thing. That’s never happened before. I guess you’re free to go.”
Wow. Robert is so hard to get along with that even his hair left him?
OEC’s first comment and link got me thinking. I get that its wrong to sleep with my super hot cousin, but would it be okay to sleep with a clone of my super hot cousin? That’s not in the Bible is it?
Actually, ol’ e cross, I rejected it.
That probably wasn’t fair of me to say. There ain’t no good guy. There ain’t no bad guy. There’s only my hair and me, and we just disagree.
Back to the topic of urban farming. mark, do you have a rabbit? Perhaps, Clementine was using the homonym of hair: hare.
If I clone myself, and have sex with the clone of myself, does that make me gay, straight or homophobic?
Your heir?
Clay Pidgeon, I believe the University of Georgia did a study involving precisely just that very question back in the mid 90s.
So please, so that we may answer your question accurately, please hook yourself up to the PPG and watch the video linked above.
…and if you post high readings on the PPG while watching this video, you’d be classified as madmanamourous.
Clementine is the best. You two are raising such a fantastic little being!
If Clementine runs off with your ‘do’, you’ll be left hareless, hairless, and heirless.