If the situation called for it, would you be able to drop the bomb like Clinton? Seriously, could you turn the key? And, if you had the choice, would you use the nude bomb or the gay one?
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drop the bomb
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(Thanks to Eric and Katherine for the gay bomb link.)
If I had to choose between the two, I’d choose the nude bombk. (I think the gay stuff would just happen naturally in the aftermath.)
Actually, if it were up to me, I’d pour funding into the Brown Note project?
Barry Goldwater once said: “You don’t have to BE straight to SHOOT straight.” We are at a great disadvantage at the moment for chasing away those men and women who want to servee, but whose sexual preference doesn’t jibe with General Pace and his radical right Christian views.
Of course, there’s also the funniest joke in the world.
I recently acquired footage of the secret government experiments and gay-bomb testing.
Mark, I’ll make you a copy.
Geez, it’s fun to think what could happen if that weapon fell into the wrong hands.
Which begs the question… If you had access to a “gay” bomb, where would you detonate it?
I know it would be wrong for me to say Mecca, so I’ll say the SuperBowl, at half-time.
Yes, that’s my final answer.
The Republican National Convention.
The Blue-Collar Comedy Tour
MTV Spring Break.
Does the gay-bomb have de-closeting capabilities? If not, I doubt it would have much affect on the the Republican National Convention, or Mecca.
You know, “CHA”s (Chemical-Based Homosexualizing Agents) have been in wide use for nearly a quarter-century now. Originally developed by the US military in the early 80s, at the direction of the Reagan Administration. Plans were to release the CHAs into Soviet water supplies. The Iron Curtain would soon be replaced with something a bit more ‘homey’ and ‘cozy’…say a nice flowing chiffon thing with a cute, simple pattern in cerulean and teal maybe.
The US Military’s CHA Programs were discontinued when it appeared that outed-to-closeted ratios could not be improved. Among test subjects, for every “queer-eye” created, there were at least three “head-job” by products, which often proved to have terrible taste in fashion and decor.
Though it was noted that communities where the test labs were located (Provo,UT; Topeka,KS; Grand Rapids,MI) experienced modest increases in examples of good taste, the blow-back was clear. Gold’s Gyms and corrugated metal churches were popping up like dandelions. The benefits were clearly not worth the consequences. The programs had to be abandoned.
Unfortunately, the CHA technology soon proliferated and was in all the wrong hands. In secret attacks, the chemical agents have been used frequently and in every corner of the globe.
Locally, one such attack, devastated a Western Wayne County Republican District Convention, leaving nearly every office holder in the Livonia-Plymouth-Canton communities suffering from the crippling side-affects.
With regard to the “turning the key” thing, I know I couldn’t do it, and wouldn’t. There’s no logic in it. While it can be argued there is reason for the threat to exist, it can not be argued once the order is given that it should be followed. You’d need the most stable yet unquestioning person you could find for that job.
I had a friend stationed at Minot AFB in North Dakota in the late 80s. He went out to ICBM silos located all over the state to perform maintenance checks. He was once in a silo when the launch command center ran a pre-launch test at that site. He is the only person I know who has actually experienced the sensation that World War III had commenced. He described in pretty good detail his immediate reactions to the event. It was several minutes before he and the other guy in the silo were able to get a response from the launch command center, informing them that the pre-launch activity was a test exercise and that they didn’t realize there were men in the silo.