and the fish were delicious

A female friend in Chicago tried to send me a video last night. When I couldn’t open it, I asked her what it was of. This is her matter-of-fact response:

“There are two Japanese ladies in the video, one is on her back with her ankles behind her head. The other one is shoving live fish into her butthole with the help of a funnel. Finally she gets the fish in and then she licks the woman’s butthole and all of a sudden the bent over woman moans and dozens of these fish start shooting out of her butt. Along with some substance that looks like pancake batter. The velocity is quite astounding, as is the quantity of fish. Then the other lady pushes the pooped-out fish onto the woman’s stomach and that’s about it.”

Yeah, “that was about it,” she said… Nothing too unusual. Just a woman projectile –shitting salmon.

I have no desire to see the film (really), so don’t post links, or try to email clips to me. I would be interested, however, to know if the fish go into the woman’s butt head-first, and are then somehow able to turn around inside of her. It seems like it would be incredibly difficult for a fish to make either leg of the journey backwards… And, I should point out, salmon have been making this seasonal journey since the beginning of time.

If only the producers had thought to hire me to write the script for the remake of the Incredible Mr. Limpet… I’ve got one hell of an idea!

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5 Comments

  1. brett
    Posted February 7, 2005 at 4:38 pm | Permalink

    this just sounds like a re-creation of jesus’ miracle with the loaves and fish, basically.
    As a non-Japanese keeper of ‘ornamental fish’, I’ve always found it moderately unnerving that the key difference between myself and hobbyists there is that once their fish reach a certain length, they generally remove them from their tanks and grill them.
    I would also add that I hope these young women don’t use a species of weather fish called the ‘Kuhli Loach’, which I’ve kept several specimens of. The little eel-like creatures have retractable spines hidden in their gill array that, when frightened, project out at right angles to their body. I read a fish-keeping book from the 1950’s once that felt it neccessary to warn its readers against trying to swallow them live.

  2. stella
    Posted February 8, 2005 at 9:11 am | Permalink

    Apparently, according to WaiWai, they are beginning to have various health epidemics in Japan directly related to the amount of wierd anal play but particularly corphragy (sp?) that is now occuring all over Japan. It seems like all Japorn is now emanating directly from planet bizarro. It just seems like eating omelettes made that way is more like something theyd serve you in hell but instead people are paying for the experience. Apparently there really is just no accounting for tastes.

  3. Posted February 8, 2005 at 10:46 am | Permalink

    Good Lord, Mark! Does your mother read this blog?

  4. Tony Buttons
    Posted February 8, 2005 at 12:20 pm | Permalink

    Japanese fish-shitting is an art, and I won’t sit by and allow you to make fun of it. So, do me a favor and SHUT UP ABOUT THAT WHICH YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND! Until you’ve actually seen a school of cod coming out of a woman’s rectum, you have absolutely NO RIGHT to comment. PERIOD.

  5. Posted September 27, 2005 at 12:28 am | Permalink

    I’ve seen the video and I’ll never be the same again. Since you asked, the fish go head first and seem to be small enough to turn around in there. Hard to tell if they are flying out head or ____ first. he he. A “freind” emailed the link/clip to me and it no longer works. Probably best.

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