the resurrection of the ten-layer debris sandwich

Don’t look for any rhyme or reason to tonight’s post. I don’t have a lot of time (my batteries are rapidly dying), so I’m just going to blurt out a few things quickly, just to flush them out of my system before going to sleep.

1) I think Linette trimmed my nose hair last night as I slept. I distinctly remember playing with a few long strands before drifting off to sleep last night, and, when I awoke, they were gone. (note to self: create some kind of nose hair guard)

2) I was just looking for Christmas presents for my family on Amazon and came across something called the “Hide-a-gun Picture Frame.” I just wish I had the money to get them all photos of Clementine with Uzis inside.

3) It looks as though a sixteen year old blogger in Alaska had her mother killed a few days ago. The last entry on her Live Journal site says simply, “Just to let everyone know, my mother was murdered. I won’t have computer acess until the weekend or so because the police took my computer to go through the hard drive. I thank everyone for their thoughts and e-mails, I hope to talk to you when I get my computer back.” And, yes, it’s apparently true. So far, I’ve read the article in the local newspaper and the state police report, and it seems pretty clear that blogger Rachelle Ann Monica Waterman had a hand in her mom’s death. Her on-line friends, for the most part, don’t seem to be too troubled by what she did. The general consensus seems to be that the real people who deserve condemnation are the guys who kidnapped and killed her mom… and they deserve the blame not necessarily for killing her, but for doing it in such a way as to attract the attention of the police. (Instead of knocking her out, putting her behind the wheel of her car, and crashing it somewhere, so that it looked like a drunk driving accident, they decided to douse her with gasoline, lock her in a van, and burn her alive.) Here’s one of my favorite quotes from the site of one of Rachelle’s young friends, “She isn’t some murdering pschyopath. She’s a real person, with a enjoyment of buying underwear….” (Some folks are saying that this is the first instance of a blogger/murderer, but I seem to recall that my friend Steve knew a person who crossed that particular finish line almost a year ago.)

4) Speaking of the complex relationships between mothers and daughters, I stumbled across the following quote in another site’s comments section a few nights ago: “All I got from my mother was laziness and breasts.”

5) As you know, on occasion I like to sign up for fundamentalist newsletters. Well, last night I signed up to receive updates from Moral Law, Inc, a group in Alabama that seems to be somehow tied to Justice Roy Moore and his efforts to see the Ten Commandments introduced into American law. Well, within half an hour of signing up, I received my first piece of Christian spam, under the subject line, “Christian Loan Advice.” Here’s the text:

Hey again. I am running late right now but I wanted to email you before I go and pick you up to go shopping. You are probably wondering how I can shop so early for presents? Well I found this site and wanted to let you know that I refinanced my home and got the extra cushion I needed for the holidays. You can search hundreds of lenders and it only takes 30 seconds. It’s the best Christian lender that I have found!

I probably should have expected as much from a site that sells “ten commandments” lapel pins (10 for $99) and Christian calling cards.

6) My upper left eyelid has been twitching since Thanksgiving and I’m worried that it might be the first signs of MS.

7) Can someone verify this? Should I be buying all my gas from Shell? (Thanks to Mouse Musings for the tip.)

8) I stopped by the gym this evening after work, and, before getting on the exercise bike, I picked up a sweaty copy of The Nation to read (I actually wanted to grab the copy of Redbook with Kelly Ripa on the cover, but I got embarrassed). In one of the articles, the author quotes a conservative contact as saying that, Bush was “hired” for the job of president because he promised to aggressively privatize and deregulate. I found that (the suggestion that corporations essentially hire our persident now) to be almost as frightening as the mention in a children’s book that I’ve been reading to Clementine of a primitive “DANGER” sign spelled out in dead monkeys.

9) Reading the Daily Kos site, I stumbled across two discussions that I thought might interest you; one is on transportation policy initiatives, and the other is on energy policy. Oh, and there’s also a good list of ten things to consider going in to ’08.

10) And, lastly, our friend Cory, picks up the Intelligent Design (or “creationism”) discussion where we dropped it yeterday, and runs with it.

OK, I’m going to bed now. Goodnight my invisible friends.

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8 Comments

  1. Posted December 1, 2004 at 9:17 am | Permalink

    I wrote to Snopes asking if they had anything to add to the Shell gas thing. I’ll let you know if they respond.

    So if you join up with Moral Law, Inc. they’ll take you shopping? That’s rather Christian of them.

    I think the quivering eyelid is a sign of turkey poisoning. Or a side effect to signing up for fundamentalist newsletters. Probably nothing to worry about.

    And I have to know: what children’s book spells out “Danger” in dead monkeys?

  2. Posted December 1, 2004 at 10:02 am | Permalink

    Blog‘ No. 1 word of the year: A four-letter term that came to symbolize the difference between old and new media during this year’s presidential campaign tops U.S. dictionary publisher Merriam-Webster’s list of the 10 words of the year.

  3. alicia
    Posted December 1, 2004 at 2:34 pm | Permalink

    re: Shell, we had a speaker where I work a few months ago who has done extensive research into coal and greenhouse gas. Anyway, she said that both Shell and BP have CEOs who are standing behing Kyoto and other environmentally sane measures because they “realize it benefits them and their families” rather than whining about how HAAAAARD it is to meet those tough american standards.

    So I’ve vowed to buy Shell or BP on that basis alone.

    As to eye twitching, I can tell you (one MRI later) that eye twitch plus sustained tingling and numbness in arms and legs does not necessarily mean MS (unless it comes back. I’m waiting)

    be well.

  4. chris
    Posted December 1, 2004 at 6:08 pm | Permalink

    Mark, I had an eye twitch about six years ago that lasted for about two weeks. Both the MD and the therapist said something like Oh yeah, that happens and it will go away. No answer as to what it was except stress. Its a trip huh? Just twitching away like some loose trip wired rebel ganglion. Then one day it was gone. But not the desire to kill bugaboo owners with it.

  5. Tony Buttons
    Posted December 2, 2004 at 6:00 am | Permalink

    It’s a small, small world. You see, I’m a real person with an enjoyment for buying underwear too! As I don’t leave the house though, I buy all of mine on-line from JC Penny. However, as I don’t tend to come into contact with real people very often, the prospect of committing murder is somewhat distant. Practically speaking, it would be shortsighted for me to do away with either my postman or the woman who brings my food. And, even if I did, I couldn’t leave to dispose of their bodies. I guess I could cannibalize them, but the thought of eating either of them isn’t exactly making my mouth water. (She’s very old and very bony, and he has very bad body odor.) As for the theft of your valuable nose hairs, have you thought of sleeping in a bee keepers mask? I’ve been sleeping in one for the past decade, since I read a statistic as to the number of spiders the average person consumes in their sleep. And, as for your eye problem, have you tried just smacking it really hard? I’ve found that sometimes that works well. Best of luck.

  6. Kristi Coulter
    Posted December 2, 2004 at 9:48 am | Permalink

    My eyelid quivered for the entire three weeks between agreeing to buy our house and closing the deal. Once it was over, no more quiver. It’s not MS–it’s just some random nerve thing probably related to stress or fatigue.

  7. mark
    Posted December 2, 2004 at 6:23 pm | Permalink

    The dead monkeys spelling out “danger” were in one of the Lemony Snicket books. I can’t recall which one. They’re a bit old for Clementine, but we don’t think we’re doing too much harm reading them to her now. In a few more months, however, it probably wouldn’t be appropriate for us to be reading her stories about kids that lose their parents in a fire, and are then chased around the country by an evil man determined to steal their fortune and kill them… As for the eyelid, it’s still quivering, but I’m not terribly anxious about it, which is surprising for me. I’ve done a pretty good job of convincing myself that it’s just stress, like all those times when my eyeball fills up with blood. Thank you to those of you who wrote in to calm me down… And thank you Alicia for the information on Shell and BP. If you have any more information like that, please send it along and I’ll reprint it on the front page. I think a lot of us would like to know more about which companies we should and shouldn’t be supporting… And thank you Tony for the wonderful image of you consuming your bony, old Meals on Wheels delivery person… Hopefully I don’t dream about it tonight.

  8. Posted December 3, 2004 at 11:40 am | Permalink

    Ahhh. The Series of Unfortunate Events. My son has read the first 10 of them and I had read up to book six or seven. No dead monkeys yet for me that I recall. Good books. I hope the movie doesn’t suck.

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