tonight

(Warning: What you are about to read is extremely uninspired. I just got home from a long day at work and I have very little left to give…)

Ive felt pretty lame lately. I read a lot at night and I collect lots of links, but then I never get around to posting them. They just accumulate in a Word file that grows by pages every day. I just checked it and its 143 pages long right now — thats 143 pages of links and other stuff that I wanted to tell you about, but never got around to. There were at least ten things I wanted to tell you about yesterday. Quite a few of them were sent in by readers. I feel as though I let them down because I didnt link to their stories. This happens every day. Please dont give up on me though. I feel as though I might yet be able to turn my life around

My dog is licking my feet and I find myself liking it. Its hard for me to stay negative when my dog is licking my feet and ankles Is this, I wonder, what human intimacy is like?

She (the dog) rolled around in shit this morning, so I had to tie her up and spray her off before going to work. She hated it. She looked at me like shed never forgive me. Now, shes licking my feet though. Perhaps shes forgiven me for washing off the thick coat of shit. (I drove to work convinced that Id somehow coated myself in dog shit in the process of washing her. I kept pulling pieces of my clothing up to my nose to sniff at them. I must have sniffed my tie five times during the fifteen-minute drive.)

I just checked the webstats program. It seems as though Ive been consistently getting about 150 readers a day here at MM.com. I dont know if thats good or bad. I guess its OK. I was kind of hoping it would keep going higher, but it seems to have leveled off. Maybe thats the saturation point. Maybe there are just 150 people that can stomach this stuff. I suppose that its possible, however, that I really have 4,500 readers and that they just come once a month each. Either that or theres just one person who checks 150 times a day. Sadly, I think thats probably closer to the truth.

And heres some of the news that Ive been sitting on:

Kez wants you to know that the Feds thought they had a lead on the whereabouts of Jimmy Hoffa, or at least the syringe that administered the drugs that knocked him out the fateful day that he disappeared. Kez also want you to know that theres a new film out that revolves around blogging and other on-line activities.

The Sex Pistols want to play Baghdad and Thomas Friedman, being the realist that he is, stays focused on the matters at hand (like Pat Robertson on stays focused on cock).

Slate says that Bush lies, and Tarantinos Kill Bill is to be released in two parts, like an old-time serial.

Doug Skinner thinks it was planted, but a person claims to have found Nessie bits, the fossilised remains of a 150-year-old ocean-going reptile in shallow water off the banks of Loch Ness. And a reporter from the Village Voice locates and interviews the rarest of beings, the Hasidic blogger.

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