the debris sandwich

Tonights edition of the debris sandwich is dedicated to three great sexual pioneers – Buddy Hackett, Katherine Hepburn, and Buddy Ebsen. Perhaps now that theyre all dead, someone will have the courage to step forward to explain the untraditional relationship that held them together for over five decades.

Contents of tonights sandwich:

A black, curly hair from the head of Chelsea Lowe: MM.com reader Chelsea Lowe appeared this morning on NPRs Morning Edition, speaking in defense of telemarketers. You can hear her by following that link and scrolling down until you see Commentator: Telemarketers View. She says shes getting lots of hate mail as a result of the piece (which is quite good, by the way). Lets hope she decides to share some of it here.

A handful of spicy Chilean blob: They still dont know what it is, but many are suggesting that the MacDonalds-sized heap of flesh that washed up on the shores of Santiago a few days ago belonged to a giant octopus. (Thank you to Doug Skinner for bringing this to our attention days ago. I should have posted it when I he told me, but I didnt want to cause mass hysteria If anyone could get both Doug and I samples of this blob for analysis, we would be appreciative.)

A slice of chicken painted to look like beef: If you didnt hear it from anyone else yet, our President the other day asked that our troops in Iraq be attacked. When asked about guerilla activities directed at U.S. soldiers, he said, Bring them on. For those of you without memories, this is the same President who went into hiding on Air Force One when his country was being attacked. He wasnt standing on the lawn of the White House saying, Bring em on. I can assure you of that.

Assorted condiments: I am proud to announce that someone found the site today by searching for olsen twins feet.

A generous slathering of lard: According to some reports, Karl Rove, the smug little man behind our President, jokingly yelled out at a parade last weekend (when a pro-Dean contingent walked by) that hed most like to run Bush against Dean in the upcoming election. Apparently, he thinks hed have a victory in the bag.

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