what if mark maynards friendship was auctioned off and no one bid?

I dont want to come across as being over-dramatic. I certainly dont want to suggest that Ive been stabbed in the back or anything. This, after all, wont be among the most serious breeches of trust to be recorded in the history books. This wasnt Deep Throat providing information on the Nixon Whitehouse. This wasnt Benedict Arnold doing whatever it was that he did. No one is going to die as a result of whats just happened to me. No one is going to jail. I may curse for a while. I may accuse someone of betrayal. But, all in all, its not that bad.

He could have stabbed me though the eye with a rusty shiv, and then run off with my wife. Thats what I need to keep telling myself.

It could be worse.

What happened? you ask.

Well, I have just found out that a long-time pen pal of mine is looking to cash in on my recent celebrity (remember, USA Today on-line did mention this site a month or so ago and I do have a few dozen readers a day) by selling my letters to him. I feel like JD Salinger must have felt when Joyce Maynard, the anorexic Yale undergrad who had an affair with the author in the 1970s, decided to put all of his love letters to her up for auction My friend, Kez Panel, is in the process of doing something very similar me to. While I would be surprised if there is much in the way of sexual content, Im sure there are other tidbits of information that the media would love to get their hands on.

From the write-up on Ebay, Kez, it would appear, is auctioning off 34 of my personal letters to him, along with a dozen copies of my magazine, Crimewave USA, and three of my musical recordings.

I feel as though I just flipped on the TV late at night to find my mother auctioning off the Mothers Day cards Id made for her over the past three decades. I feel betrayed.

Do I mean nothing to you, Kez? Did our friendship mean nothing to you?

As for the auction, Im kind of curious to see what it goes for. What is a decade of friendship and trust worth these days?

All hyperbole aside, its a pretty good collection of stuff. As much as it pains me to say this, you should probably bid on it. (If you do get it, please send me photocopies of these 34 letters. Id be curious to see what hes included in this assortment and what, if anything, I said that was of interest.)

Actually, in all truth, Im glad that Kez saved all of this stuff for so long. Lots of people, Im sure, toss the letters that I write to them away imediately, along with the issues of the magazine. Its kind of cool that this little archive has been maintained. I just hope it goes to a good home.

Actually, now that Ive written all of this, I feel better. Im not mad. I am, however, a bit scared, scared that absolutely no one will bid on this massive collection of Mark Maynard memorabilia. Im afraid that Im about to be taught a very valuable lesson in humility.

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