ohhh, what a cute little. aaaahhhh!!!! what the fuck is that?

Linette and I saw a horribly ugly baby while grocery shopping last Saturday. The baby had a head shaped like a fully-grown Butterball turkey and a body like a small frog. It had little bumps all over its face, as though it had been freshly plucked of its feathers. Its skin looked cold and clammy. It was the yellow.

Linette said it looked like the baby in Eraserhead. Later, she said it looked as though it had gone through a windshield.

Its mother kept pushing it toward us. No matter where we were, wed inevitably hear it coming. That happened a dozen different times. Wed escape for a minute and then, sure enough, it would be right back. Wed hear its wailing scream and then, five seconds later, it would be right in front of us. We tried skipping aisles. We tried doubling back to the produce section. Everything we tried, failed. The thing always found us.

Not to sound cruel, but we should have killed it when we had the chance.

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